Tel Aviv, Israel
Wow.. I feel so good that I find it hard to find the words. My heart feels open, I feel powerful and quiet. It feels like I have found a key, the key to my strength. And I have found the door I want to open.
What happened? I guess it was the adding up of a couple of things. Yesterday I felt crappy.
I had left the Chassidic wedding to crash at the friend of a friends place. This in itself is tremendously cool, by the way. After staying with Riphael and Adinah I spend one night at their friends Reuven and Yehudith. Because I had no place to stay in B’nei Brak Reuven called a friend of his and explained I was a traveling Buddhist writer blablabla and needed a place to sleep (it was really impressive to hear how Reuven elevator-pitched me, he should be my agent). The guy at the other side, also a very religious man, was supposedly thrilled because it was an opportunity for him to do a good deed. This is absolutely the cool side of strong religious practice; to have an attitude of really wanting to do good, to embrace the opportunity when it comes along.
Anyway, I slept nicely and woke up early. After morning meditation my host still hadn’t woken up so I decided to leave quietly. I jumped in a bus, got stuck in traffic and found myself an hour later at the wrong train station. I wanted to work on my post about the wedding because I recently noticed that I can only write about something when I can still feel it. So I realized I was losing time and was putting pressure. Then I got lost and couldn’t find wifi. I wanted to be all cool about it and the coffee is good here so I treated myself on a cup of coffee. Then I had to buy another because I found wifi at a coffeeshop. I’m sensitive to caffeine and started feeling stressed out. Security people were obnoxious, that didn’t help either. I found a place to work but with the email coming in it starts to pile up. Blablabla.
I reconnected with Miles, dropped my bags in the dojo and went for a workout to get rid of the caffeine. Then I meditated for about 40 minutes. Later that night I joined the meditation class: another hour and a half of meditation. Guess what? I felt brand new. More importantly: I feel that I have found my secret recipe. Two hours of meditation and an hour of exercise: when I give this to my system, it flourishes. It’s up to me. If I stick to this discipline my bullshit will go away.
I had a strong email exchange with a Jewish friend. I said some confrontational stuff, called him on his shadow. I signed with my full name (including my spiritual name): Atalwin Sho-Jitsu Pilon. Atalwin means Noble Friend, Sho-Jitsu means Truly Straight and Pilon means mortar: a truly straight, bullshit crushing, noble friend. It’s a strong name. I realized that want I want to do this year is own my name: become more and more clear, leave no room for bullshit, be straight and be a noble friend. This realization together with the recipe feels incredibly powerful.
I am two weeks on the road now. I am ready.
Nice post. Can I make a recommendation. I think it would be helpful if you put, in bold, at the top of the post where you are currently located in the world. I think it would help the reader put your words into the proper context, and also interesting to follow your blog posts as you traverse the globe.
Looking forward to hearing about your further adventures.
Michael (from Chicago)